# Scene 4

*A cheerful pink room in the home of Strader and his wife Theodora. One notices by the arrangement that they use it as a room in common, where they carry on their various work. On his table there are mechanical models; on hers things to do with mystic studies. The two are holding a conversation which shows that they are absorbed in the fact that it is the seventh anniversary of their wedding day.*

*Strader:*  
'Tis seven years to-day since thou becam'st  
The loved and dear companion of my life  
And also unto me a source of light,  
Which shone upon a life which formerly  
Was threatened only with approaching dark.  
In spirit-life I was a starving man  
When thou didst first stand at my side and give  
That which the world had aye withheld from me.  
For long years had I striven earnestly  
To probe the depths of science with my mind  
To find the worth of life and goal of man.  
One day I clearly had to recognize  
That all this striving had been quite in vain,  
For thou didst show me that man's spirit seeks  
How to reveal itself through certain things  
Which shunned my knowledge and my eager thought.  
I met thee then amidst that company  
Where Benedictus was the guide of all,  
And listened to thy revelations there.  
Later I saw how in Thomasius  
The spirit-pupilship could work with power  
Within the human soul. What thus I saw  
Robbed me of faith in science and good sense,  
And yet it showed me nothing at that time  
Which really seemed to me intelligent.  
I turned away from all the realm of thought  
And went on living in an aimless way  
Since life had ceased to be of worth to me.  
I gave myself to technical pursuits  
To bring oblivion and forgetfulness,  
And lived a life of torment, till once more  
I met thee; and we grew good friends.

*Theodora:*  
It is but natural, that on this day  
Remembrance of those old times should again  
Stand out so vividly before thy soul.  
I also feel a need in mine own heart  
To look back once again upon those days  
When we were drawn together in life's bond.  
I felt the constant strengthening at that time  
Within me of the power which made my soul  
Able for knowledge from the spirit-worlds.  
And under Felix Balde's noble lead  
This power grew on thenceforward to that height  
At which it stood just seven years ago.  
About that time I met Capesius  
One day in Felix' lonely woodland home.  
A long life had he spent in deep research  
And won his way to spirit-pupilship.  
He greatly wished to be allowed to learn  
My way of gazing on the spirit-world.  
So after that I spent much time with him.  
And in this house I chanced to meet with thee  
And could bring healing to thy mental wounds.

*Strader:*  
And then the true light shone into my soul  
Which long had only gazed upon the dark.  
I saw at last what spirit is, in truth.  
Thou ledd'st me on in such a way to see  
What was disclosed to thee from higher worlds,  
That every doubt might swiftly disappear.  
All this at that time worked so much on me  
That first I thought of thee as nothing else  
Except a medium for the spirit's work.  
It was a long while e'er I recognized  
That not my mind alone hung on thy words,  
Which did reveal to it its true abode;  
But that my heart was taken captive too  
And could no longer live without thee near.

*Theodora:*  
Then didst thou tell me that which thou didst feel  
And all thy words were in so strange a form;  
It seemed as if thou never hadst one thought  
That all the longing dwelling in thy heart  
Could even hope it might be satisfied.  
Thy words showed clearly that it was advice  
That thou wast seeking from thy sister-soul.  
Thou spakst of help which thou didst then require  
And of the strengthening of thy powers of soul  
Which otherwise must keep thee prison-bound.

*Strader:*  
That my soul's messenger could be by fate  
Destined to be companion of my life  
Lay very far from all I had in mind  
When, seeking help, I showed my heart to thee.

*Theodora:*  
And yet the words that heart from heart unloosed,  
How soon they proved that this must be our way.  
Hearts often have to point the way to fate.

*Strader:*  
And when thy heart pronounced the fateful word  
My soul was flooded o'er with waves of life  
Which, though I could not feel or know them then;  
'Twas not till later, when my memory  
Rose from the depths of my subconscious soul,  
That they fulfilled themselves in rays of light.  
I could know all, from what my mem'ry taught,  
But could not live it then, because so much  
Still held me far apart from spirit-life.  
'Twas then indeed I first became aware  
Of spirit in close contact with my soul.  
Ne'er have I felt like that again; and yet  
That knowledge gave to me a certainty  
That hath illuminated all my life—  
And then flowed on these seven wondrous years.  
I learned to feel how e'en mechanic skill  
Which now I study, is enriched by souls  
Whose attitude t'ward spirit-life is right.  
'Twas through the spirit-power which thou couldst give  
Kindling my life that I should so perceive  
The hidden world of forces whence quite suddenly  
As if it had been prompted, there appeared  
Before my wondering spirit, that new work  
From which we now may dare to hope so much.  
Thus in thy light I felt within my soul  
The full awakening of all those powers  
Which would have perished, had I lived alone.  
This certainty of life which I had won  
Let me stand upright then, just at that time  
When, in such startling wise, Thomasius  
Condemned before the Rose Cross brotherhood  
The work of his own brain, and cast himself  
Adrift, with judgment hard, just at that hour  
Which could have brought him to his life's full height  
This inner certainty could hold me fast  
Then all the outer world seemed to reveal  
Naught but a mass of contradicting facts.  
Through thee alone have I gained all this power.  
The spirit-revelation which thou gav'st  
Brought me the sense of knowledge I had won;  
And when the revelation came no more  
Thou still didst stay my strength and light of soul.

*Theodora (in a broken sentence, as if meditating deeply):*  
Then when the revelation came no more ...

*Strader:*  
'Tis that which often made me sorrowful.  
I wondered if 'twere not deep pain to thee  
To lose thy noble power of seership,  
And whether thou didst suffer silently,  
Lest I should grieve: and yet thy temperament  
Showed thou couldst bear with calmness fate's decree  
But lately thou hast seemed to me to change,  
Joy no more streams from thee as heretofore  
And thine eye's glowing light begins to fade.

*Theodora:*  
Indeed it could not be deep pain to me  
When spirit-revelation disappeared.  
My fate had only changed my way of life;  
Which I must needs accept with patience calm—  
But now 'tis born once more, and brings great grief.

*Strader:*  
This is the first time in these seven years  
I cannot fathom Theodora's mind:  
For each experience of spirit-life  
Was such a source of inward joy to thee.

*Theodora:*  
Quite different is the revelation now.—  
At first, as then, I feel myself constrained  
To drive away all thought that is mine own;  
But where, before, after some little time  
When I achieved this inward emptiness  
A gentle light did hover round my soul  
And spirit-pictures wished to form themselves;  
There come now unseen feelings of disgust;  
Which come in such a way that I am sure  
The power I feel within comes from without—  
Then fear I cannot banish pours itself  
Into my life and governs all my soul—  
And gladly would I flee from that dread  
Shape that is invisible, and yet abhorred.  
It tries to reach me with its evil will  
And I can only hate what is revealed.

*Strader:*  
With Theodora 'tis not possible.  
They say that what one thus lives through, is but  
The mirrored working of one's own soul-powers.  
Yet thy soul could not show such things as these.

*Theodora (painfully, slowly, as if reflecting):*  
I know indeed that such ideas are held—  
Therefore with all the power that still was mine  
I sank into the spirit-world and prayed  
That those same beings who so oft before  
Were kind to me, would graciously reveal  
How I could learn the cause of all my pain.

*(Now follow in broken words):*  
And then ... the shining Light ... came ... as before  
And formed ... the image ... of an earthly man. ...  
It was ... Thomasius.

*Strader (painfully, overcome by the quick inrush of feelings):*  
... Thomasius ...  
The man in whom I always have believed. ...

*(Pause, then meditating painfully)*

When I again recall before my soul  
How he behaved towards the Mystic League.  
How of himself and Ahriman he spake—

*(Theodora is lost in contemplation, and stares blankly into space, as if her spirit were absent.)*

O Theodora ... what dost thou ... see now? ...

*Curtain*