# Perceiving Subtle Soul Processes in Meditation Practice

## GA 266III — 9 November 1913, Nuremberg

### Esoteric Lesson

It is so difficult for esotericists to make progress today because they imagine the experiences they are supposed to have as being far too tumultuous. However, it is particularly important to pay attention to the most subtle processes.

Imagine you are walking in a lonely forest on a quiet evening. Every little sound will be audible: the falling of leaves, the approach of a sleigh, and so on. Now imagine the big city; in the noise of the streets you will not perceive anything like this, and yet all these quiet, subtle sounds are also present there.

In meditation, all kinds of things that have not reached the threshold of consciousness emerge from the subconscious. I often hear people complain that when they meditate, so many thoughts and images arise in them that they cannot control and cannot free themselves from. — But this can definitely be seen as progress in meditation. For as the astral body and the ego loosen their connection with the physical and etheric bodies during meditation, the esotericist comes to objectify his other self, as it were. He should attentively observe this soul-spiritual aspect of himself, which weaves and works without his intervention, in these processes.

From within, the esotericist is tempted by Lucifer, and from without by Ahriman.

An example: Let us assume that you live in a well-behaved, quiet family, but next door there are people who often read and tell stories about robbers. Even if you do not hear any of this with your physical ears, it is still imprinted on the etheric body and then emerges again during meditation. Another example: you witness a dog being run over. Whimpering and barking may occur in your own body as a result of witnessing such an accident. In other contexts, an entire witches' sabbath can arise during meditation. The meditator should not despair over this, but rather rejoice, since they can sense the connection and thereby learn to view themselves more and more objectively with everything that has previously influenced them.

It is like scanning your entire body during meditation. Here and there, feelings of pain will arise as a result of egoism and other things. This scanning begins above the head and then moves down the entire body in small sections.

You will also learn to draw conclusions about past experiences based on symptoms of illness. For example, a middle ear infection can indicate the strangest impressions that have previously taken place on the etheric body, for example by listening to pirate stories in one's youth without full consciousness, but which then had a very vivid effect.

If someone falls asleep during theosophical or similar contemplations, what they heard continues to have an effect on their etheric body, especially if they subsequently experience “remorse” or reproaches for having fallen asleep; this often has a very strong effect on the subconscious.

When reproaching oneself for still being so bad because ugly images keep rising during meditation and inner contemplation, we should find comfort in the words of the Gospel: He took our sins upon himself.