# Johannes, Monologue, Second Scene

JOHANNES: There was a time  
When I could still believe  
That what the eyes see and the ears hear  
Was founded in itself.  
But knowledge  
Has taken away my delusion.  
I know that everything  
I see around me  
Must be erased,  
Leaving the spiritual forces  
Of the realm of existence —  
Like the color tone of the face  
And the strength of my hands,  
As soon as the spirit extinguishes the body.  
I know that deception is the ground  
On which I stand;  
And that I sink into the bottomless pit,  
If the powers of my mind do not deceive me.  
So it became clear to me that ghosts  
I know, are not realities.  
But where is truth for me?  
So I must always ask.  
And always it sounds  
Through the illusions of my senses:  
O man, know thyself! (Echo)  
Terribly cruel words,  
I followed you.  
You taught me that not only  
Delusion and error surround me,  
As long as I trust my senses and  
Everyday reason,  
That even the form in which  
I appear to myself is a figment of delusion;  
O it is so benevolent, this true  
Form, which I sense — and  
More than sense — it hides itself  
Behind a delusion — but meaning  
There is in its concealment — for it shows  
Reveals itself in truth, stands beside it,  
What man is — what he  
Is in all nakedness — a tempting being,  
Who greedily desires all the pleasures of the world  
Only to satisfy himself,  
A being that is both animal and  
Demon — who  
Coldly destroys what is most beloved,  
If destruction satisfies it —  
To whom every greed  
Fulfillment only begets new greed.  
— To recognize oneself  
Means to allow oneself to be subjugated by oneself  
— and  
In subjugation to feel lust  
— to recognize oneself  
Is to create a delusion that  
Takes delusion for truth —.  
To recognize oneself means  
To strive for the highest happiness — means  
To enjoy the deepest unhappiness for the highest  
Happiness — means to consider  
Nothingness for everything. — So  
I place myself before me,  
When the word resounds:  
O man, recognize yourself1  
No, not recognize yourself,  
Flee yourself.  
But where to flee?  
Flee the world,  
I cannot do it.  
The world is only my  
Spread-out Self —  
But this Self is different,  
It should bring elevation and light.  
A terrible accusation.  
It hurls at me from all sides:  
It is you, but you have  
Destroyed yourself, you are only your  
Distorted image. — And guilt —  
You push me coldly into nothingness.  
But I could be crushed by you.  
No, I cannot do it.  
I recognize the nothingness in me,  
But this nothingness,  
It torments me with fear,  
It whips me with curses that  
I myself must bring upon myself,  
It kills me through powerlessness,  
To chain me in powerlessness  
To myself.  
Your rocks fall upon me,  
Your waters take me in,  
But when you fall upon me,  
When you wanted to bury me,  
I would rise from my  
parts, so that in  
eternal shame transformed  
would be the temporal.  
I sought trembling.  
Alas, I am lifted up,  
lifted up into nothingness —  
chained to the slave man,  
whom I wanted to flee.